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Punk rock was my first girl, she left me a scar so I have her still (Beulah -- Silver Lining)
Sometimes Justin wishes that he'd met Ethan first, not because he doesn't love Brian-God, that couldn't be further from the truth-but because he thinks things might have been easier. His whole life might have been easier-the whole series of events might have been almost the same, but if Brian hadn't been in the center of it, Justin might have been able to let it go, somehow. But Brian was first, and the desperation and obsession and constand push and pull are Justin's template for a relationship, now, and Brian is the only one who will really put up with that from him.
Justin is never sure whether to be grateful.
But these hands are too hungry to be gentle, can't you understand.
"Surface", Orisha
He had forgotten this—that Justin could hold him down without half trying, hands broad and sure on Brian’s shoulders, weight pressing on the small of his back, calves tucked under his thighs to keep him still. There’s enough leverage for Brian to get himself onto his elbows, and he does, but then Justin’s hands are moving. It’s too good for calculation, but Brian writhes and bucks anyway. Justin’s ass stubbornly refuses to move, and then he shifts lower, and Brian can’t catch his breath, but--it’s such a relief not to have to stop fighting.
Sometimes Justin wishes that he'd met Ethan first, not because he doesn't love Brian-God, that couldn't be further from the truth-but because he thinks things might have been easier. His whole life might have been easier-the whole series of events might have been almost the same, but if Brian hadn't been in the center of it, Justin might have been able to let it go, somehow. But Brian was first, and the desperation and obsession and constand push and pull are Justin's template for a relationship, now, and Brian is the only one who will really put up with that from him.
Justin is never sure whether to be grateful.
But these hands are too hungry to be gentle, can't you understand.
"Surface", Orisha
He had forgotten this—that Justin could hold him down without half trying, hands broad and sure on Brian’s shoulders, weight pressing on the small of his back, calves tucked under his thighs to keep him still. There’s enough leverage for Brian to get himself onto his elbows, and he does, but then Justin’s hands are moving. It’s too good for calculation, but Brian writhes and bucks anyway. Justin’s ass stubbornly refuses to move, and then he shifts lower, and Brian can’t catch his breath, but--it’s such a relief not to have to stop fighting.
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I was so scared when I posted these!